Intimacy after a divorce can be intimidating. It is almost as if it is your first time (again), even though you and your partner may have had an active sex life before, during, and even post-marriage. Sex after divorce can contain a mixture of feelings. We are here to talk about moving forward and being confident sexual beings.
I always asked my divorced friends, “What was it like having sex for the first time after your divorce?” some answered ‘Oh, I entered a “d” parade and went crazy, and it was fun,” or others stated, “It was so awkward like I was in high school or college all over again.”
Either way, it's all right to experience new ways and people to figure out what works best for you; many of us are not looking for the “next one” right away. We want to explore and see what’s out there and do not want to settle for the first one.
How do you get out there? Dating sites, friends, and just getting out to a new scene will help you meet people that may want some action and nothing else. You must decide your ground rules before going out there or make them up as you go along. YOU ARE AN ADULT; act like one. You are allowed to have some crazy fun sometimes and not think anything of it.
The time you wait between finalizing the divorce and getting intimate with someone else - is up to you.
Research states more on the side of when should I enter a new relationship after a divorce. Most say to wait one year before dating after your divorce, though for some, that can seem like an eternity. Casual sex is a much easier transition post-divorce and can enlighten your world. Making you realize there is lots of life to live after divorce, and you can do that on your terms.
A few things to consider still:
· Practice safe sex – yes, you can still contract an STD in your older age.
· Have a safer sex conversation. Have you been tested for STDs?
· Get used to good old condoms again.
· Trust your feelings when “hooking up.”
· Rediscover your wants and needs.
Here are some great articles on sex after divorce:
Reader’s Digest: https://www.readersdigest.co.uk/lifestyle/dating-relationships/sex-after-divorce-its-not-as-scary-as-you-might-think
Huffington Post: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/sex-after-divorce-the-dos_n_2577415
Oprah Daily: https://www.oprahdaily.com/life/relationships-love/a31956827/sex-after-divorce/