As a fellow divorcee, I find myself at many times and in many ways getting frustrated at situations that may be within my control or on the flip side, out of my control. It’s called life and we must learn to figure out how to navigate the more constant frustrations that pop up here and there. To name a few, although I could list 100, let’s begin.
The top divorce frustrations, immediately after the finalization:
• You are just lost in your thoughts
• You start to lose friends
• You feel like you are the only one hurting so bad but remember, you have other people in your life besides your ex; please reach out
• Continued disagreement about financials with your ex
• Poor communication between you and your ex
• Challenging and confusing schedules for your kids
Year one and beyond:
• Eating alone
• You find yourself crying at any minute of the day
• You are often left with people not thinking about you
• You are not invited to the typical gathering; people may think that’s all you’ll talk about, but you know it’s not
• You try to get out and do things but do not feel like it; your mind and body have been through so much, but give yourself a pass and some time
• You miss seeing your kids every day
• You are unsure how to navigate the dating world
And to that point, here are some top dating frustrations:
• You are not connecting with anyone you meet
• You find that men and women are on all the same sites, and you are not matching
• You match, and you find out this person is a bit off his/her kilter
• They overshare information that is more suited for an in-person conversation
• You meet someone whose photos are fake
• You fall for a fake profile
• You go on a date, and they only want one thing
• You are not aligned with the other person’s beliefs
• You are not sure where to meet people
Believe me, none of the above are atypical; every day can bring frustration when you’re divorced and at some point when you’re ready to try and find love again. But remember, you are not alone; I promise there is story after story with similar situations that can be resolved.
I write this because I got so frustrated the other day that I couldn’t see straight. Was it my kids? NO. Was it something that didn’t go right with work? NO. Was it someone I talked to that may have led to something romantic? Things were too good to be true, and I found out. YES. When I have multiple prospects, but no one ever reaches out to me first? YES.
But such is life, and it’s full of frustrations that happen every day. My advice is to take a minute or a day and wind down, put things in perspective, and keep your head up. You never know what’s around the corner.