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When you love multiple people…


As a single woman or man, you find yourself loving multiple people; it can be confusing. You may feel like you can't settle down in a relationship or have difficulty committing to anyone. However, if you find yourself loving more than one person at once, then it's likely that your heart is doing its best to show you love in any way possible!


This doesn't mean that things are "wrong" with your feelings of attraction or desire for others; instead, your relationships are just as unique and different as every other. So how do we know when it's okay to love multiple people? In this post, I'll discuss why it's okay to love multiple people at once, how those feelings manifest in our relationships with others around us (and ourselves), and how they affect how we treat ourselves throughout such experiences. Let’s start with the following:


If you think you're polyamorous, it doesn't mean you're cheating.

Polyamory is not about having multiple sex partners or cheating on your partner, it's about loving more than one person at a time. While this might sound like an excuse for infidelity to some people, it isn't at all. You can be faithful and still love multiple people at once.


Polyamory isn't a sexual orientation; it's a relationship orientation.

Polyamory is about being honest and open about your needs and having multiple relationships with honesty and communication. And it has nothing to do with sexual orientation, who you're attracted to, or how many partners you want in your life. Instead, polyamorous women and men are simply those who choose to openly acknowledge their ability to love more than one person at once, and they usually do so by entering into multiple romantic relationships concurrently (as opposed to serially).

You can still be monogamous if you love multiple people.

Simply put, here are the facts:

o You can be monogamous and have multiple partners.

o You can be monogamous and not have multiple relationships.

o Or, if that doesn't work for you, there's always the option of being in one relationship with more than one person (aka polyamory).


Loving multiple people doesn't make you a bad person or a cheater; it just means that your needs differ from others, and you're willing to acknowledge them.

In a polyamory relationship, you can love multiple people at once. You're not cheating on your partner(s) if they know and are okay with it (though some partners might not be). Polyamory is not a sexual orientation--it's an orientation around relationships.


Polyamorous relationships are often called "open" or "polyfidelity," meaning there are no rules against seeing other people. Still, everyone involved knows about each other and agrees that it's OK for everyone involved to date other people outside the primary relationship(s). Polyfidelity consists in making an explicit commitment between all partners involved to ensure that each person has equal access to their needs being met within the context of having multiple partners.


In conclusion, I hope this article has helped you understand that polyamory isn't just about sex. It's about loving multiple people and being honest with yourself and your partners. You can still be monogamous if you love multiple people, but your needs may differ from others. The most important thing to remember is those loving multiple people doesn't make you a bad person or a cheater: It just means that your needs are different than others, and you're willing to talk about them.


Xo,

Erin


Time to Dish:

  • What are your thoughts on this topic?

  • If you agree, why?

  • If you disagree, why?

  • Have you had feelings for multiple people?


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